You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling: When 'Okay' Isn't Enough
When Love Feels Like It's Fading
Being "okay" in your relationship is completely different from being in love. If you find yourself questioning, How do I know if my relationship is over?, it might be time to take a closer look at what you're feeling.
When you say, "I love him," but deep down, you know you’ve lost the spark, something else happens too—you start losing feelings for yourself. And losing feelings for yourself, settling for 'good enough,' and avoiding the reasons why that loving feeling has faded is a dangerous and slippery slope.
💔 Love Can Fade—Even Without Conflict
Falling out of love doesn’t always happen in a fiery crash of arguments and betrayal. It can slip away quietly, without loud fights or dramatic exits. And that slow fade? It’s terrifying, heartbreaking, and confusing.
So, what do most people do?
They avoid the problem.
They use passive-aggressive behaviors.
They resent their partner.
And ultimately, they begin to hate themselves.
Many people find themselves stuck in relationship limbo, uncertain whether they should stay or go. But waiting for a sign can keep you trapped in an endless cycle of dissatisfaction.
⏳ The Endless Cycle of Waiting
You’re waiting for that one moment that will affirm your decision—the final straw, the undeniable sign. But here’s the hard truth:
That waiting game makes you a magnet for negativity. It keeps you hyper-focused on what’s wrong, reinforcing the cycle of dissatisfaction. You think you’re stuck between two choices—staying or leaving—but in reality, you’ve already chosen a third option:
🚨 The Default Life
You wake up.
The kids go to school.
The laundry gets done.
You and your partner don’t even argue.
Everything is fine.
Nothing changes.
But deep inside, you feel numb. The dullness settles in, and you turn it inward, losing pieces of yourself in the process.
Worse yet, if you’re raising children in this autopilot existence, you’re unknowingly teaching them that love is mediocre.
❤️ You Deserve More
If you’ve ever wondered, How do I rekindle lost love?, the first step is acknowledging that you want something better. You don’t have to keep waiting for an external event to push you into a decision—because if you do, the change that finally shakes you awake might be traumatic.
Instead, take control.
🔧 Repair or Rebuild: The Choice Is Yours
If your car breaks down, you don’t sit around hoping it fixes itself. You call a mechanic.
So ask yourself: Is my relationship worth more than my car?
Then stop waiting. You have two clear choices:
Fall back in love with your partner.
Fall back in love with a different life.
Either way, the first step is getting the right help. No one can navigate this alone.
💡 Life Is Calling
If you're stuck in marriage on autopilot, you don’t have to go through it alone.
Hire a coach. It doesn’t have to be me—but it does have to be someone. Because no one can coach themselves through life’s biggest decisions.
I’m Julie, an Award-Winning, Master Certified Leadership and Life Coach. Let’s chat.
If you enjoyed this post, join my inner circle of people on a mission to design a life they don’t need to escape from!
